GlassMan
Pisces
HDF Silver Supporter
Redondo Crew
  
Redondo Beach, California, USA
Posts: 5,761
APPD 0.73
Post Rank: 13
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Posted: Feb. 22 2006,11:18 am |
Post # 1 |
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The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.
He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.
However, the gates are closed and as Forrest approaches the Gatekeeper, St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's
certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you.
I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass
it before you can get into Heaven."
Forrest responds, "It shur is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shur hope the test ain't too hard; life was a big enough test as it was.
"St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test has only three questions.
First: "What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?"
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the Questions over, tell me your answers."
Forrest says, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today and Tomorrow".
The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit for that answer.
How about the next one?" asks St. Peter? How many seconds in a year?"
"Now that one's harder,! " says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve."
Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve!? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd….. "
"Hold it, " interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind.....but I'll have to give you credit for that one, too.
Let's go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?
"Sure", Forrest replied, "It's Andy."
"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first 2 questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt it from the song we sing in church all the time.
"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN.........."
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest, run."
Give me a sense of humor,
Give me the grace to see a joke,
And to get some humor out of life,
And pass it on to other folk.
It's a fact of Life:
After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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12-25-2025 Three Word Post.....The Next Generation.... (Rep.#20,039) from: BigDog
I like it!! 
Great One 
