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RVRGIRLFemale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,12:19 am Post # 1 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Sorry, I Can't do That!

A police officer pulls over this guy who had been weaving in and out of the lanes.

He goes up to the guy's window and says,
"Sir, I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."

The man says,
"Sorry officer I can't do that. I am an asthmatic. If I do that I'll have a really bad asthma attack."

"Okay, fine. I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."

"I can't do that either. I am a hemophiliac. If I do that, I'll bleed to death."

"Well, then we need a urine sample."

"I'm sorry officer I can't do that either. I am also a diabetic. If I do that I'll get really low blood sugar."

"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."

"I can't do that, officer."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm too drunk to do that." :beer  :drink


I'M ALL ABOUT THE PINK

HAVE A PHENOMENAL DAY!

 
Thats "MRS" RVRGIRL 2 you.....
"When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt."
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RVRGIRLFemale Offline
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Lake Havasu City, AZ
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,12:20 am Post # 2 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

The Helpful Wife

A male driver is pulled over by a cop and the following conversation takes place:

Man,
"What's the problem officer?"

Cop,
"You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone."

Man,
"No sir, I was going 65."

Wife,
"Oh Harry. You were going 80." (Man gives his wife a dirty look.)

Cop,
"I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light."

Man,
"Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light!"

Wife,
"Oh Harry, you've known about that tail light for weeks." (Man gives his wife a dirty look.)

Cop,
"I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt."

Man,
"Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car."

Wife,
"Oh Harry, you never wear your seat belt."

Man,
"Shut your mouth, woman!"

Cop,
"Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way?"

Wife,
"No, only when he's drunk."


I'M ALL ABOUT THE PINK

HAVE A PHENOMENAL DAY!

 
Thats "MRS" RVRGIRL 2 you.....
"When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt."
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website  | Member # 143 | Joined: 6-07-2003 |
stingrayMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,12:23 am Post # 3 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:rotflmao  :rotflmao  :rotflmao  :rotflmao


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shuemanMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,5:25 am Post # 4 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:rotflmao  :good  :beer
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GoFastRacerMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,6:07 am Post # 5 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Good ones!.. :good  :laugh  :laugh
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weldwadeMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,7:14 am Post # 6 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:rotflmao funny  :good


Keep your GUNS!

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BigDogMale Offline

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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,7:56 am Post # 7 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:rotflmao   I like them both!!   :good
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GlassManMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,9:08 am Post # 8 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Sounds like someone I know! :eek  :D


It's a fact of Life:

After Monday and Tuesday, even the Calendar says : WTF .......
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Carrera EliteMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 11 2006,2:33 pm Post # 9 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Some People Just Talk Too Much!! :laugh  :rotflmao  :D


Sarcasim, Just one more thing that I offer for free!!
I've Reached The Age Where Happy Hour Is A Nap!!

WWW.StormPokerRuns.Com

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RVRGIRLFemale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 12 2006,12:15 am Post # 10 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (Carrera Elite @ May 11 2006,2:33 pm)
Some People Just Talk Too Much!! :laugh  :rotflmao  :D

Don't talk about me that way... You barely know me.. :D


I'M ALL ABOUT THE PINK

HAVE A PHENOMENAL DAY!

 
Thats "MRS" RVRGIRL 2 you.....
"When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt."
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website  | Member # 143 | Joined: 6-07-2003 |
Carrera EliteMale Offline
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1990 Carrera 23.5 Classic
Post Icon Posted: May 12 2006,1:54 pm Post # 11 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

Quote (RVRGIRL @ May 12 2006,12:15 am)
Quote (Carrera Elite @ May 11 2006,2:33 pm)
Some People Just Talk Too Much!! :laugh  :rotflmao  :D

Don't talk about me that way... You barely know me.. :D

I wasn't talking about you, unless those stories were true life sstories about you.........  :stupid  if that's the case, then I guess I'am talking about you....  ;)


Sarcasim, Just one more thing that I offer for free!!
I've Reached The Age Where Happy Hour Is A Nap!!

WWW.StormPokerRuns.Com

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| Member # 8 | Joined: 12-04-2002 |
Bullitt BobMale Offline
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Post Icon Posted: May 12 2006,3:48 pm Post # 12 see this member send this member a private message  quote this post in reply

:rotflmao Excellent!!!!!!!!  :good
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| Member # 632 | Joined: 5-11-2004 |
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